Guys and girls alike are always looking for ways to become better lovers. All you have to do is stand in line at a supermarket to notice all the magazines promising the most amazing sex advice ever. After awhile, you’ll probably start to doubt whether or not there are ways to improve your sex life and become the kind of lover your girlfriend would brag about to her friends.
It’s time to stop doubting. There are always ways to improve your sex life, and trying to be an ideal bedmate for your girlfriend should be a high priority, guys! If she looks bored in the bedroom, it is up to you to find a way to arouse the sexual goddess that is trapped inside her in order to improve your sex life. After all, a horny girlfriend is a happy boyfriend, right?
What is her ideal bed partner?
The first tip to finding out how to be a better lover is to figure out what she wants in a lover. This can be a tricky process, so you have to tread carefully. Don’t just climb into bed and announce that you think she’s sexually bored, so you’d like ideas on how to improve. That’s not sexy and it places her in an awkward position of having to tell you exactly where to put your hands, lips, tongue, penis…Half of the joy of sex is in not knowing what will happen each time you crawl into bed together. Will it be a quickie or will there will lots of foreplay followed by hours of touching, nibbling and climaxing?
Her choice in movies matters in the bedroom
Women are pretty easy to read a lot of the time. Take notes on what she likes when you are outside of the bedroom too since there are ample opportunities to observe her likes and dislikes and then translate them into your sex life. For instance, take the innocent example of picking out a movie. Is she always after the stereotypical romantic comedies or does she want comedies or horrors? Each genre can tell you a lot about her, which can help you determine her ideal bedmate.
For example, if she’s into comedies sans the romance, she might be the kind of woman who gets sexually aroused through humor. Now, I’m not suggesting you paint a silly face on your ass and hope it turns her on, but don’t take yourself too seriously in the bedroom either. The bedroom isn’t a sanctuary ‘ it’s okay to laugh during sex, which is something that too many couples forget!
Her best friend
Another great way to find out more about your girlfriend’s ideal sexual partner is to find out from her friends what she’s like. Again, tread carefully here because it would be quite strange for you to ask her best friend whether she prefers being on top or taking it from behind. I’m suggesting a broader approach – for example, tell her friend that you want to plan a romantic evening and you want her advice on how to make it special
for your girlfriend. Perhaps your girlfriend would be thrilled to find rose petals on her bed – maybe this is a secret fantasy that she’s been harboring for years and thinks it’s silly to tell you about it. There are lots of things a guy can find out just by listening to her friends.
Those silly magazines she reads
You know those magazines she’s always reading? It’s time you took at look at them too. Women tend to pick magazines that have articles that interest them, so pay close attention to the kinds of magazines she’s reading. Many women’s magazines have sections that talk about what women like or don’t like in bed, so this is great resource for finding out information on what she’s craving.
If you are really lucky, there may be sexual quizzes in the magazine, as is often the case. While the answers are a bit contrived in most of those quizzes, you may be pleasantly surprised to discover that your mild-mannered girlfriend is actually a closet sado-masochist who is dying to be tied up and whipped!
Translating this into better sex
Once you’ve done your sleuthing, it’s time to put the information you’ve gathered to work. Here are some final tips for becoming her ideal lover:
#1 Take charge
Sometimes us girls are too shy to actually let you know what we want, which is why you’re left with the awful task of trying to guess what pleases us. And if the only thing you’ve learned about having sex with women is from porn movies, you’ve got a long road ahead of you. That’s why women are turned on by men who take charge.
This doesn’t mean you demand sex from her; this means that instead of trying to coax information out of her as to what she likes or doesn’t like, go out on a limb. Visit a sex store site and buy her a vibrator.
She might be embarrassed initially, but she will learn to love it. Plus, you will reap the benefits as she becomes more comfortable with her sexuality. Once she realizes how much she likes her new toy, you can suggest that she demonstrate for you how she pleasures herself when you’re not there. You may be surprised to discover she’s a nymphomaniac exhibitionist.
#2 Mix it up
If you and your girlfriend always do the same thing, it’s going to get pretty boring. That’s reason enough for trying new positions when you have sex. Don’t plan it out and tell her over dinner that tonight you want to try page 7 of your Kama Sutra guide.
Remember tip #1? Take charge. Start with gentle foreplay to get her excited, and then move to a new position that you want to try. If you don’t think she’s liking it, try yet another position. As long as you are into her, kissing her, touching her and not directing her body as though she were an actress on a film set, she’ll won’t even realize that you are mixing it up to see what she likes best. It will be all new and exciting for her and she will love every minute of it!